TRON:Legacy (light)cycled into theaters this weekend, making it the latest in a line of 1980s cultural landmarks brought back anew for 21st -century audiences. But surely there are some films yet unsullied the dreaded “update”? Hey studios, get on that! As a reminder that not everything from the 1980s that could be remade has been, MovieMaker presents a list of some cult hits from the ’80s that should get remade as massive blockbusters.
Keep in mind that “cult” is a relative term. So is “should.”
Friday the 13th (1980)
Directed by Sean S. Cunningham
There haven’t been any sequels of this made yet, right?
Clue (1985)
Directed by Jonathan Lynn
Clue, a murder mystery that is, yes, based on the board game, should not be on the list, seeing as Robert Zemeckis is already said to be planning a remake. But I’m going to talk about it, because it’s not too often one gets the opportunity to talk about Clue, which is a shame. Currently movies based on the board games Battleship, Monopoly and the Ouija board (which isn’t even really a game) are being discussed. Battleship is actually filming now, scheduled for release in May 2012. What all board game movies need to know is this: Clue is your golden standard, and you will never live up to its brilliance. Consider yourself warned.
Ferris Bueller’s Day Off (1986)
Directed by John Hughes
Ferris has grown world-weary in his old age—his dreams of constant truancy dashed by the expectations of corporate America—and he is now a slave to the Man. He has a midlife crisis (but Ferris’ midlife crisis is, of course, cooler than everyone else’s midlife crisis) and has to recapture his lost youth in advance of some arbitrarily-placed deadline (he has to give a speech at his old high school and can’t be late or they’ll make him retake the 12th grade? I don’t know, this is why there are script consultants). Will Principal Rooney make an appearance? Why yes, I think he just might!
Labyrinth (1986)
Directed by Jim Henson
Don’t do it. No, really. Trust me on this. You will thank me later.
Withnail and I (1987)
Directed by Bruce Robinson
There is just such wacky sequel potential here, I don’t know why it hasn’t been exploited. Culture shock (city boys, country life, uh oh!), alcoholism (only the funny kind, of course—that depressing, realistic side of alcohol addiction is a real downer) and the addition of a quirky love interest. Can’t have a love triangle without one of those! Studios, I present to you the idea that will restore your reputations: Withnail and Us. Call my agent.
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